Ask questions
Doctors and nurses don't always explain what they're doing, or whether it's mandatory.  It’s okay to be inquisitive, and you should be.  And, be sure to ask for what you want: room with a view, juice, ice chips, etc.

Bring a few things for yourself
The mom-to-be is the center of attention, but you'll probably be spending the night at the hospital too, so don't forget to pack some things for yourself. Essentials: A clean shirt and comfortable shoes.  Though women in labor necessarily lose their modesty, coaches don't. So consider bringing a bathing suit, too, in case you decide to join your partner in the shower during labor. Finally, bring something to eat.

Know what to expect
Many dads say they never used the breathing patterns they learned at birthing classes, but they're sure glad they learned what labor and birth entails, from start to finish. Labor is not the right time to be flipping through What to Expect When You're Expecting, so bone up on your reading beforehand. And go to a labor class with an open mind — you'll get solid, basic information, as well as a sense of how other dads are planning to get through the event.

Be flexible
Labor strategies that work for some women, may not work for your partner. A labor coach's job is to discern what works, and be prepared to drop what doesn't.  Well before your baby's due date, you and your partner should take time to discuss her expectations and options; later you can take the initiative while keeping her wishes in mind.

Find a compelling distraction
Giving birth is a long, hard job. At some point during the hours of labor, you and your partner will discover something — perhaps a breathing pattern, a spot on the ceiling, a stuffed animal from home — that she can focus on during the contractions. With the Lamaze method of childbirth, your job is to help your partner find this distraction, and then bring her back to it whenever she starts to think she won't make it.

Be a one-person support team
Though there will be lots of experienced people around you to whom you can look for help, you will be your partner's most important support. How can you keep her comfortable? By doing whatever she needs, from running to the cafeteria for a popsicle to getting her another drink or calling the doctor or midwife with a question.

Know your capabilities
There's a lot going on in the birth room. Be aware of what you are willing to do during the process, and what you want to leave to the professionals.

Be prepared to take charge of the situation
Only you and your partner know what you both want, but she may not be in the best condition to make hard decisions. Be ready to step in with some decisive action if the situation calls for it.

Be ready to wait
Unlike what you see in the movies, most women labor for hours before they even go to the hospital. Indeed, many couples find it more comfortable to spend the initial stages of labor at home. Besides, many hospitals won't let you check in until your contractions are regular and close together.

Be there
This is one of those events when just showing up is the most important thing of all. Even if you want — or have — to leave most of the hands-on stuff to the pros, it will matter that you're there. Some expectant dads say they're worried they won't be up to the task, but skipping out on labor and delivery isn't an option these days. If you're signed up for the parenting train, the first stop is the birth room. And it's worth it.